Want to start a little discussion here.
I was at a talk the other day - one which I personally thought later on was really a male-apologist session. We listened to males complaints about females in relationships and were told males are really "more logical" and females "more emotional". Although the speaker went on to say, "it’s not a bad thing, it’s just the way we are", the context of the entire discussion certainly made me feel like being "emotional" was a bad thing.
But anyway, what really irked me was when the speaker started talking about having multiple partners - it’s not an equal world, she said, and promiscuous guys will be excused moe than promiscuous girls. Fair enough, I thought - my past experience had certainly told me it was not an equal world. But then the speaker went on to blast promiscuous girls - "I think girls like that really have no respect for their bodies." I could see some members of both sexes silently nodding, and I was wondering: what about guys who sleep around? Don’t they also not respect themselves?
The fact that guys were left out of that equation reinforces the double standard. Plus, I know quite a few girls who have multiple partners, and they’re very sassy ladies. They’re smart, and I respect them for the contributions they make to the world. If they choose to celebrate their sexuality by having multiple partners, why should we condemn them as not having respect for themselves?
To the floor now: what do YOU think?
Yup. Double standards suck. If girls are expected to be virgins, we should expect the same of guys too. Both girls and guys should treat their bodies with respect. Personally, I don’t agree with choosing to celebrate your sexuality by having multiple partners. Sex to me is a special act, which should be shared with that one person whom you really love. Whatever it is, BOTH guys and girls ought to respect their bodies; no one party deserves to be condemned more than the other for the same act committed.
Comment by Rhysenn — June 14, 2006 @ 2:28 am
Making disparaging remarks then attempting to validate oneself through perceived gender roles is merely another form of hypocrisy.
Comment by another cynical blogger — June 18, 2006 @ 7:40 pm
I think this is a form of violence agaisnt women to deny them their right to their bodies on how they would like to express their sexuality - in terms of orientation (not the case here) and choice of expression (case here). sigh. so many layers of oppression. women who are sexuality active raises eyeborws - the recent
“study” reported in the nst (2 days ago me thinks) wait lemme find the link.http://www.nst.com.my/Current_News/nst/Wednesday/National/20060621083900/Article/index_html was surpirsed that women are more active than men. Hello? There are more stimulative nerves at the vagina than the penis??? Sad as well that women have to resort to “hymen” restoring to prove they are virgins to have sex with one man for the rest of their lives (marriage). sigh.
Comment by tze yeng — June 24, 2006 @ 10:47 am
Agreed. I know for a fact that not everyone can handle multiple partners and a lot of people who sleep around (of BOTH genders) do so out of insecurity. That however shouldn’t automatically invite the whore/stud label.
I do know a couple of people with ‘promiscuous’ sex lives which is really ok as long as both parties are emotionally honest and responsible when it comes to STD and pregnancy protection. The main thing is being comfortable with what you’re doing, not fitting into what your society says or what you think looks cool on Sex and the City.
Tze Yeng, good to see you! I used to tell people if guys would dump me over a hymen or two it’s so evident that I’m not being loved for who I am and I deserve better.
Comment by petra — September 7, 2006 @ 9:29 am